When I heard on Thursday that pop star Katy Perry, CBS Mornings host (and noted Oprah bestie) Gayle King, and Jeff Bezos’s fiancée Lauren Sánchez would be joining three other women on Blue Origin’s next space mission this spring, my first leftist instinct was to wonder what that money could be used for if we lived in anything approximating a normal society. (FYI, it costs about $200,000 to go to space.) Then, I had this thought: What, exactly, would Perry, King, Sánchez, and the other members of the first all-female flight crew in decades—former NASA rocket scientist Aisha Bowe, bioastronautics research scientist Amanda Nguyen, and the film producer Kerianne Flynn—find to talk about while hurtling through space?
So, I’ve temporarily put my ever-fermenting class rage aside in order to imagine a few possible conversation topics:
- The ongoing hike in egg prices
- Gay rights (I assume Perry is still “pro”)
- Rocket mechanics (that has to come up at some point, right?)
- What, exactly, “bioastronautics” are (no shade to Perry, Sánchez, or King on this one, because I have absolutely no idea myself)
- How to keep your yacht staff from revolting and overthrowing the captain’s quarters
- The best eye creams for dealing with space jetlag
- Where to buy the most slimming flight suits (Amazon, I assume?)
- Partner cohabitation issues (maybe Bezos and Orlando Bloom snore; I don’t know!)
- Aliens (as in, “Are they real?”)
- Aliens (as in, “Did we just see one?”)
- The 2025 Oscars (surely Flynn will have some thoughts)
- The best snacks to eat in space (I feel like I would want beef jerky?)
- Tax loopholes
- Who the most annoying famous people are (I assume every celebrity who regularly interacts with celebrities has them all ranked)
- The vibe in space (I hear there’s no atmosphere! *Pause for laughs.*)
- The solemn but heavy burden of having the mantle of feminism placed upon you as a woman in the public eye in the 21st century
- Doing a little Indigo Girls sing-along, à la Barbie?
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