It’s 12 p.m. in a west London hotel and Luann de Lesseps, otherwise known as the Countess, is wearing a Jovani blazer smothered in glinting, multicolored jewels. She smells like sweet perfume, with faint undertones of champagne, and on her head balances a towering and slightly jaunty Philip Treacy hat that makes her look even taller than her usual 5’ 10”. She gets out her phone, trying to find a photo of the guy she’s been dating, her manicured nails tap tapping on the screen, before her assistant gently interjects. We’ve only got so much time, he says. After which she has to attend other engagements—including a “rebirth” ceremony, which is hard to understand as a concept but from which she will apparently emerge feeling brand new.
To any Real Housewives enthusiasts, Luann needs no introduction. The Countess was an OG cast member on Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New York City from Season 1 through 12, and has become something of a cabaret star and a gay icon in the process. During her 12 years on RHONY, she became known for a few things: incredibly quotable one-liners (“Even Louis Vuitton makes mistakes”), a sort of thick-skinned resilience (one moment she’s navigating an affair, the next she’s clinking wine glasses at a luncheon), and a story arc that not even the greatest TV writers could have come up with (two very different marriages, one book on etiquette and one escape from handcuffs after being arrested in Palm Beach wearing nothing but a floral sundress). If this newer wave of housewives tries very hard to bring the drama for the cameras, Luann always tried—and failed spectacularly—to contain it, which has only worked to bolster her camp appeal.
She’s also known for being a deft hand when it comes to meeting men (“Am I the Kim Cattrall of the family, or what?”). Whether she’s seducing 20-something pirates on Caribbean islands (a Season 5 storyline that she still sort of denies), or marrying and then divorcing a New York bachelor within the space of seven months, Luann’s romantic life has consisted of many chapters, each one more interesting and colorful than the last. To that end—and following the news that the reality star is soon set to appear on Bravo’s first-ever dating show, Love Hotel—I caught up with Luann so that she could break down her ultimate dating tips for Vogue. Here’s what she had to say:
You can meet someone anywhere
“I used to get love notes at the gas station. You could get an espresso, a panini… or a lover. [But also] at any five-star restaurant, especially if there’s a beautiful bar. Or the home goods sections—we have Bed, Bath & Beyond. There are guys in there buying toasters. Embassy parties are also a great place because you have foreign men. I married Tom [D’Agostino], who was American, but that was unusual… and he was unusual!”
After the interview, we leave the hotel room and there’s a young man sitting in the corridor. “What are you doing down there?” she asks, towering over him. “Handsome!” She turns to me: “See? I told you you could meet someone anywhere.”
Don’t be a wallflower
“It’s all about flirting. It’s all about letting somebody know that you’re attracted to them, right? Say you’re out with your girlfriends and there’s a guy at the bar who’s good-looking and you fancy him, etc. He’s not going to walk up to the table where there are three women—he won’t do that. A woman invites men, like the queen—rest in peace, darling—and the same goes for men, if you like him. You give a note to the waiter [to pass along]: Come join us for a drink. How chic is that? Do we have time to waste, really? If you like somebody, [let] them know. Give them a Valentine’s Day card.”
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